April 2015

Fear of Invitation


“A culture of fear” is preventing many churchgoers from inviting friends or relatives to services”, said Michael Harvey, in an article in the ‘The Church Times’ posted in January this year. In 2004 Michael Harvey was a co-founder of the ‘Back to Church Sunday’ campaign - now called ‘Season of Invitation’. He continued, “Worshippers are frightened that an approach could lead to rejection, a lost friendship, or a damaged relationship.”

The survey group Christian Research found that 52 per cent of 1153 members of its Resonate panel showed “a deep-seated reluctance or resistance” to inviting people to church. Disclosing early findings at Durham University in a presentation called “Developing a Culture of Invitation”, Mr Harvey said: “Tellingly, although the question invited people to suggest what their church could do to help them invite people, most comments cited critical reasons why they would not invite anyone to their church. What we have discovered so far is that sublimated fears, perhaps related to previous rejections, are projected on to the church, with would-be inviters seeing it as unattractive, not ‘fit for purpose’ and unwelcoming”.

Two themes emerge from the research: the anxiety felt by Christians at the thought of rejection by friends if they invited them to church; and the number of Christians who do not recognise the Gospel imperative to "Go then and make disciples of all the nations" (Matthew 28.19).

Mr Harvey said that they were not prepared to invite “until their fellow congregational members and church were perfect. . . Perfectionism is riven through the Church, and this cannot be right. The Bible says where two or three are gathered in my name, I will be present. It does not say where two or three are gathered in my name, doing it perfectly well, I will be present. The Church is never going to be perfect. . .

“The respondents imply that they are waiting for the perfect moment . . . to invite. . . The name of the game is safety, and not the risk of faith.
“Unless we start to address that visceral fear, we can do as many initiatives as we like and people will still be afraid." He concluded: "I have found that more than two in every three people have someone in mind to invite. We need to better support the inviter.”

I don’t know how much you see of yourself in the above article, but for many it resonates just a little too deeply. If you think it has hit the nail on the head, perhaps you should start in prayer for yourself: that your fears would be overcome (or at least reduced!) by God’s love and strength. Only then think about one or two friends, neighbours or family members – and start to prayer for them: for their joys and sorrows, their hurts and successes. And pray that God would show you the time and place and event/service that would be appropriate. Not a perfect event or a perfect service or a perfect time but one that you are praying for, and God will be there to meet you and your friend.

 

David
April 2015